catching bugs

[click image for a bigger bug]

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A gas man walks hurriedly past our hero's front lawn.

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Unexpectedly, Sam's watch beeps. He looks carefully at the timepiece. His wife's expression is concerned, and she asks if he absolutely has to go right this minute. "Be right back." He smiles, kisses her goodbye, and grabs his sunglasses and car keys.

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This is Secret Agent Man. The watch indicated that a bug was planted by an evil Canadian mastermind named Alan, who tries to steal Sam's jokes. As Sam's eyes are shielded by the sunglasses, he glances up and down the street, careful not to turn his head. It looks clear; maybe the watch malfunctioned. He checks again it indicates a device ten feet away at 'twelve o-clock.' He walks. Six, four, two... "Aha!! Found it" he thinks.

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There is a big, juicy-looking cicada clinging to the buds of his juniper bush. Nonchalantly, he removes the bug, and squishes it underfoot, pretending not to notice that its exoskeleton houses transistors instead of slimy goo.

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From the very end of the block, an engine cranks and tires peel a little as the driver hastily splits the scene. Yup... black hummer. He probably has his goofy cat with him. Blast that pesky evil punster! Just for show, Secret Agent Man takes his car to the corner store and back. When he returns, the cicada is gone-- vanished without a trace. His jokes are safe... for now.

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No folks, I haven't suddenly decided to switch to writing corny fiction. (I can imagine the big sighs of relief from that.) It's just that I had this macro shot and didn't know what words to put with it. (There really is a Canadian Alan who tells puns; that part is true.) As for the rest of this fabrication... well, I had to say something...